Walk with me

So Daniel recently came home from traveling for close to three weeks. While he was away, my daughter decided to see if she could single handedly destroy every single grain of parenting confidence I have ever possessed.

Upon his return,  it was decided that Daniel will be a Bostonian for this coming week…Surprise! Oh and let’s throw in the anniversary of my sister-in-law’s untimely passing.  And Voilà! The Perfect Storm.

Yesterday, I decided I needed some serious me-time in order to collect the ragtag remnants of my sanity since I could feel my inner Godzilla raging, so I did one of the things I do best. I hightailed it for someone else’s well-kept garden to be alone with my thoughts.

(Daniel: Did you take a bus or did you drive? Natalie: What? Why would I take a bus? Of course I drove. Daniel: I thought this was a field trip for one of the kids. You mean you went by yourself? Totally alone? Did you meet someone there? Note our stellar prior communication. And yes, I did meet someone there, five someones in fact….a very kind gentleman who helped me figure out the name of a particularly incredible flower [see last picture which does not! do said flower justice], another gentlemen who pointed out a bird I surely would have otherwise missed [see third picture], and a family of three who asked me to take their picture. That was the extent of human interaction for the day.)

No back talking. No decision making. No one rudely pounding on the bathroom door. (Seriously, at what stage of childhood does this stop? Do I really need to instill consequences for disrupting bathroom time?) I guess you could say I ran away…for 6.5 hours.

It. was. Perfection.

The weather was perfect. The flowers were perfect. Even my packed lunch did not disappoint, which it usually does. Also, the garden gods smiled on me as I was one of the privileged to view a test run of the renovated fountain display that has been under construction for many months (years?)…thrills! The only thing that was lacking was my camera equipment and photography skills, but that’s ok because then I would have been task oriented, which is one of the other things I do best, and not present.

And while I do not claim to be a poet of any sort, these were the phrases that rang in my head from the beginning to the end of the day.

Come walk through the garden with me, embracing a slower pace of life. I promise I’ll enjoy your company. I already had my alone time.

Applying sunblock

Avoiding field trip-ers

Hanging with the white-haired

Watching birds

Appreciating art

Answering no one

Walking slowly

Breathing deeply

Smiling quickly

Drowning beauty

Soothing stillness

Flowing tears

Sitting quietly

Remembering fondly

Healing bittersweetly

Fading frustrations

Wandering thoughts

Calming spirit

Dreaming

Hoping

Being